Manfred set out, of an early morn, to bring order to his burgeoning garden with a trusty Craftsman many-tined rake. Along came Gaby, whose roque-like behavior made her unpredictable manner of speech just one more reason to blanche and run when neighbors saw her afoot. She espied Manfred, who was cooly and unruffled about his work while she harangued him mercilessly with this-and-that verbally injurious taunt.
"You are a rake and a blackguard, my dear man. It's a wonder such a bad man can have friends!" the old bag railed.
Manfred would have let it all pass; however, the bulbous biddy had pronounced "blackguard" like it looks, i.e., "black guard."
Drawing himself up to his full height, much as a bantam rooster might when feathers were all aruffle, the indignant Manfred riposted,
"If you're going to insult me, Gabriella Goosefinder, diss me right!"
Tail between her bowed legs, Gabriella trounced off red and indignant, for her departed-to-the-grammar-school-in-the-sky mother had, without success, continually endeavored to get her clueless daughter to pronounce less-familar words clearly and correctly . . .
wan, mien, aspect
